Camille had a dentist appointment today so I hurried home after dropping Gregoire off at the creche. Maman had said that we would be eating together after the appointment so I threw a picnic for two together. I picked Camille up from school and we walked together to the dentist's office where maman would be meeting us. The visit wasn't very long. Camille had her cavity filled and we were on our way back out. She and I ate lunch at the park by her school and it was back to class for her. Ha haha.
The ride home with the kids after school today was really tiresome. First of all, Baptiste took forever to make it out to the car. He dawdles as long as he possibly can before one of the teachers yells at him to get going. Then in the car, he yelled at Camille and hit her for telling me that he purposefully took forever. I stopped the car in the middle of the street amidst a green light and completely lost it. He had shoved Camille's head into the window and she was crying. He is one of very few people that have been bitched out by me, and he's gotten it several times. I will not tolerate that behavior! Baptiste got red in the face and made faces at me from behind. The little twerp isn't very intelligent. I saw it all in the rear-view mirror. Then I heard him mumbling about how he wants to move to his dad's house so I called Céline and told her everything he did and said. She had some words with him when she got home from work today. Baptiste tried to lie about some things that occurred and I happened to walk in just at the right time. I asked him to his face 'what did I say?' and he just put his head down and said 'nothing.' Maman realized at that moment that he was fibbing and sent him upstairs. I. AM. NEVER. HAVING. KIDS!!!
The entire Baptiste situation was diffused once the parents stepped in but I had had enough for one day. These kids are so physically and mentally exhausting. It didn't help when Andréa called me on Skype to talk about his pending move to America. Let me refresh your memories. The guy shoved me down on his balcony two days ago during a heated moment. Do you think I have ANY further interest in him following me to America? Je pense que non! I said in that post that I would be stupid if I stayed with him. Well, I'm obviously stupid because I haven't dumped him yet. I love him. What can I say? It's a difficult situation. I told him that I didn't see it working out between us though and that he should stop the visa process. He turned off his webcam and said he didn't want me to see him cry. That made me feel bad but he hurt me, physically. No, it wasn't life-altering and I have but one scanty bruise on my palm where I caught myself, but it was enough to make me re-think whether or not I could marry him. And at this point, no matter how much I love him, I don't think I can. Behavior like that always escalates.
I allowed Andréa get out what he needed to say, about his plans and whatnot, but when he started asking me for help, I kind of just swept it to the side. I got myself to France without help from anyone. Yes, I have help now, but in the beginning I found a home, a job, and friends on my own. I want Andréa to prove to me that he's capable of doing it too. Not only will he confirm my belief in him, but he'll get his own satisfaction through doing it the hard way. Or maybe I'm the only person that likes that. I hate the easy button.
I don't want Andréa to feel abandoned by me, but I don't know what else to do. I've sought legal advice for him, looked up the paperwork, and even looked up potential jobs. If he wants to be with me that bad, he should be able to handle the rest. I guess I'm also kind of being selfish because I don't want him weighing me down. I already have my own life and I know what I want out of it. He's still discovering himself. Maybe there's a conflict of interest too. Anyway, It's his decision to move to America. I never asked him to follow me. Sure, it would make me happy if he came but I believe that everyone needs to follow their own paths. I don't think there was any indication that he should leave France before I came along. Sure, we look good together, but if you dig a little, you see that I'm a traveler and he's a settler. I just don't think it will work out because we're so different. But when love is in the equation, you never know...You just never know.
The ride home with the kids after school today was really tiresome. First of all, Baptiste took forever to make it out to the car. He dawdles as long as he possibly can before one of the teachers yells at him to get going. Then in the car, he yelled at Camille and hit her for telling me that he purposefully took forever. I stopped the car in the middle of the street amidst a green light and completely lost it. He had shoved Camille's head into the window and she was crying. He is one of very few people that have been bitched out by me, and he's gotten it several times. I will not tolerate that behavior! Baptiste got red in the face and made faces at me from behind. The little twerp isn't very intelligent. I saw it all in the rear-view mirror. Then I heard him mumbling about how he wants to move to his dad's house so I called Céline and told her everything he did and said. She had some words with him when she got home from work today. Baptiste tried to lie about some things that occurred and I happened to walk in just at the right time. I asked him to his face 'what did I say?' and he just put his head down and said 'nothing.' Maman realized at that moment that he was fibbing and sent him upstairs. I. AM. NEVER. HAVING. KIDS!!!
The entire Baptiste situation was diffused once the parents stepped in but I had had enough for one day. These kids are so physically and mentally exhausting. It didn't help when Andréa called me on Skype to talk about his pending move to America. Let me refresh your memories. The guy shoved me down on his balcony two days ago during a heated moment. Do you think I have ANY further interest in him following me to America? Je pense que non! I said in that post that I would be stupid if I stayed with him. Well, I'm obviously stupid because I haven't dumped him yet. I love him. What can I say? It's a difficult situation. I told him that I didn't see it working out between us though and that he should stop the visa process. He turned off his webcam and said he didn't want me to see him cry. That made me feel bad but he hurt me, physically. No, it wasn't life-altering and I have but one scanty bruise on my palm where I caught myself, but it was enough to make me re-think whether or not I could marry him. And at this point, no matter how much I love him, I don't think I can. Behavior like that always escalates.
I allowed Andréa get out what he needed to say, about his plans and whatnot, but when he started asking me for help, I kind of just swept it to the side. I got myself to France without help from anyone. Yes, I have help now, but in the beginning I found a home, a job, and friends on my own. I want Andréa to prove to me that he's capable of doing it too. Not only will he confirm my belief in him, but he'll get his own satisfaction through doing it the hard way. Or maybe I'm the only person that likes that. I hate the easy button.
I don't want Andréa to feel abandoned by me, but I don't know what else to do. I've sought legal advice for him, looked up the paperwork, and even looked up potential jobs. If he wants to be with me that bad, he should be able to handle the rest. I guess I'm also kind of being selfish because I don't want him weighing me down. I already have my own life and I know what I want out of it. He's still discovering himself. Maybe there's a conflict of interest too. Anyway, It's his decision to move to America. I never asked him to follow me. Sure, it would make me happy if he came but I believe that everyone needs to follow their own paths. I don't think there was any indication that he should leave France before I came along. Sure, we look good together, but if you dig a little, you see that I'm a traveler and he's a settler. I just don't think it will work out because we're so different. But when love is in the equation, you never know...You just never know.
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