Vendredi, 22 Février 2013: Drunk People Suck When You're Not Drunk

Because I didn't receive my birth control injection on time, I got my menstrual cycle back. It took awhile but my body is still capable of it. I've been on the Depo injection since I was 16 and haven't had my period since then. For those of you who read my blog post on french birth control, you all know that I experienced horrible PMS and PMDD when I had a regular menstrual period, which is why my doctor and I decided to get rid of it. 

I was going to go out with Kami Friday night but I felt so sick I decided to stay in. Andréa thought that we were all going to go to a hookah bar in Aix together so he got upset. He eventually guilt-tripped me into going to Marseille. I didn't really want to go because I knew we wouldn't have any alone time together--he already had two of his best friends there, he didn't need me, but he insisted that he did. 

I was on the highway for a good 10 minutes before I had to pull over due to a killer migraine--an effect that usually came with my periods. I'd never experienced one so bad. I felt like my skull was splitting open. I moved myself off of the highway to a gas station and sat there for a good 30 minutes waiting for the pain to subside. 

When I eventually got to Andréa's I was pretty much dead and he did not even know what was going on. He was so drunk. It's apparently a rare occurrence around me because I'd never seen him act so retarded in all the time I've known him. Right before I got there, he had jumped off of his balcony and back on--landing on his man parts. That story was kind of funny but everything else he did kind of just got on my nerves. Maybe it's because I haven't ever seen this side of him. I'm glad he can have fun with his friends, but he was at the point where he was beyond ridiculous. And it wasn't at all attractive. Oh well, I'm glad he can have his friends for those shenanigans. 

We all got a few good laughs in (I tried even though my brain was exploding) before everyone decided to call it a night. I took some medicine and once I was able to relax, I was out. 

Jeudi, 21 Février 2013: Getting Over The Little Things

I got a bunch of messages from my friends today. They read my rant and told me that I needed to relax. Smoker told me to "give the boy a break." And I can completely hear her saying that in my head. Ha haha. She always kept me grounded in college when I treated my boyfriends unfairly. I'm glad to see that she still cares enough (7100 km away) to tell me when I'm being stupid. 

Yes, I've stopped pouting already. I realized my wrongs long before I got any of those messages though. It took approximately 1 minute after I wrote my last post to realize how utterly retarded I was for being upset. I love him. I'm IN love with him! End of story. Rachael said that she was shocked when I told her I wanted to have kids with Andréa. ANYONE that knows me personally would be because I've always been anti-children. But I've finally found someone that is worth the effort, someone that I could really spend the rest of my life with and want to. I've re-considered. Rachael says that any guy that could change my mind about that is worth keeping and that if he wants to talk, that I should talk to him. It's going to take me a bit of effort because I've always taken the easy way out of disputes in the past. But, I love him enough to try. Of course he's going to annoy me from time to time. I annoy him too. C'est la vie! Who cares if he doesn't like something that I cook??? I like it, so I'm going to continue to make it. If he doesn't like it, he can eat something else. It's that simple. 

I finally got over myself. It took a bit longer than usual but better late than never.

I went to Marseille to see him today. I loved on him for the few hours that I was able to be there and I'm heading back there once my host parents get home to watch the baby. I'm not sure if Céline has extra-special senses or not but she randomly texted me and told me that I could spend the night with him tonight. My host mom...She's so intuitive...

It's easy to lose sight of what really matters when you're so content. I know it's easier said than done but try not to take anything for granted.

P.S. - Ty is awesome. That is all...

Mercredi, 20 Février 2013: Pet Peeves

Andréa and I left each other on a bad note last night. He had irritated me earlier in the evening and noticed. I tried to forget about it but when Andréa feels like he's done something wrong, he can't let it go. He always wants to talk because supposedly discussions help relationships move forward :-P

Even though I was in a mood, I drove up to our spot after dinner--just to spend some uninterrupted time with him. The thing about me is that I bottle up my feelings, because I know I'm going to forget what upset me in the first place. It's hardly ever important enough to hold onto. That's what Andréa needs to realize. The only time I can't let something go is when people are constantly reminding me that it happened--like when he's constantly asking me what's wrong just after I had forgotten all about it. Seriously??? 

Here's the scenario. I was making chili for the potluck dinner at Krystle's house. It's my favorite recipe and I've been making it since I was 12. I couldn't find all of the ingredients at any of the local stores so I had to make some adjustments so I was already a bit put-off. Not quite annoyed yet, but...disappointed. 

Andréa arrived while I was still cooking. He tasted the chili, made a face, and told me I was missing herbs like thyme. This entire time I'm thinking "Dude...This is chili. Thyme...Seriously???" I'm sure that herbs in addition to the cumin and cayenne would've been good but this was MY recipe and I'm going to make it the same way I've been making it for the past 14 years of my life. I have a ritualistic personality. I like tradition. I like having one, concrete chili recipe. Damn it!

Andréa's suggestion kind of annoyed me but cooking is therapy to me so I forgot about it immediately. The chili was mostly done except that it tasted a bit bland to me. It was missing some zing...The tang that you get from tomatoes. I was trying to think of a delicate way of adding this punch and the only idea I came up with was lemon juice. So I added some. Andréa watched with his mouth gaped wide open and said "tu l'a tué"--meaning 'you killed it.' And no, that saying does not have good connotation in french culture. I asked my host dad to confirm and Didier bowed his head in a 'Man...you really shouldn't have said that' sort of way.

My feelings were only hurt because cooking is one of my hobbies. I'm no 5 star chef but I like to do it and I do it well. I've never had ANYONE criticize my cooking so his comments just come across as a slap on the face. I've dated chefs and my one of my best friends throws out gourmet meals every other day. These people have never told me 'you need to change this'/'you need to change that.' And they're close enough to me to not be afraid to hurt my feelings. They've criticized me about plenty of other things without me being butt-hurt. But when you volunteer your opinion on a subject that you know little about, it's kind of annoying. I'd really just like to know how many times he's made chili or even eaten it. Okay, now that's just me being a brat. I know he's just trying to help but when you say something like 'you killed it,' after you put so much time into something, it just rubs you the wrong way. I don't care if you're trying to be funny--you won't find me laughing. This is my therapy, my art. Even with this little dagger in my heart, I still forgot all about it and went on with my evening. When you're busy, the more pressing matters take priority and you don't dwell.

While we were sitting at our romantic spot, Andréa kept on pestering me about what was bothering me earlier. And honestly, I had to work to remember what it was. When I finally reminded myself, I started to get irritated again. He started asking me detailed questions about the problem and I started to get upset. I had to dig deep to figure out why I was initially bothered. I eventually got mad because I was reminded of all of the other times he had 'formed opinions' about my platters.

The first time I made Andréa dinner he said "It's good...Even though I don't like lemon." Not a huge critique for my citrus chicken, but I told him that I'm obsessed with lemon so he should expect it often. The other night when maman and papa went out to dinner I made a steak with red-wine reduction. His comment this time was "The sauce was good, but the steak had too many nerves. It was too chewy...but that's not your fault." Ugh...Oh, and we can't forget the caramel apple cheesecake I made for Valentine's Day [sans caramel] which he deemed "too sugary." Oy vey...I didn't even add a quarter the amount of sugar called for in the recipe. He blamed the sweetness on the whipped cream--which had zero. It was probably the applesauce. And really? You're going to tell ME, the girl that hates sweets, that she made something too sugary? Shoot me now. Please. REALLY.

I've decided that I'm going to stop cooking for him. He's going to have to take on the responsibility of making all meals. That's fine with me. I prefer to eat anyhow. 

There's always this problem with all of my boyfriends. Each one has been an insufferable know-it-all in some category and subsequently made me feel insecure about each passion of mine. There was CJ who made me feel like I knew nothing about cars. Then Mike who is the reason why I stopped singing. Matt the med school whiz who told me I never took the MCATs and had never taken them himself. And then now Andréa with the cooking. I mean, can't you people just let me freakin' enjoy what I enjoy??? If I'm not hurting anyone, please, leave me be. 

Andréa's reaction kind of put me off too. He was kind of just like 'I can't believe you're getting upset over this. I love your cooking! I eat everything!' But come on...Just because you eat everything doesn't mean you actually like it. And if you like something, then just say you like it. Stop nit-picking. It's annoying. You don't HAVE to say anything else. 

I also really hate it when he chimes in and says "I do everything for you" when we have a disagreement. He pays attention and he knows my likes and dislikes and I've never had to tell him. But for something like this where I've outwardly said that it bothers me and he continues to do it. It just doesn't make sense. How is he not catching on? 

I walked into my house last night without kissing him goodbye, or really acknowledging him at all. I forgot my phone in my car so I accidentally ignored his messages. I would've ignored the texts anyway if I had had my phone. I just wasn't ready to continue the conversation yet and I try at all costs to avoid saying things I don't mean. I got my phone out of the car this morning and read a text from him that basically said 'I couldn't sleep last night. It's true that I need to pay attention to what I say, but you're not without faults either.' Was that supposed to be an apology? Because it doesn't sound like it.

All I've got to say is...I enjoy my food as well as my friends, family, and french family. Maybe Andréa should spend some more time exploring his friends' and their girlfriends' cooking styles and pass some judgement over there instead of just sharing it with me. 

Okay, rant over. Thanks for listening!

Mardi, 19 Février 2013: Hair Cuts & Dinner Parties

I kept Gregoire home today because he had pink eye. I didn't want him to spread that all around and neither did his mom. He wasn't really sick though so I took him out for a bit. My au pair friends and I are all a member of a closed group on FB and we post get-togethers, etc. Yesterday, Alyssa posted on the wall asking if anyone knew how to cut bangs. I've had a lot of experience cutting my own as well as my friends' so I replied. Liezl had a good pair of scissors so I picked her up on my way to Jaumegarde with Gregoire. 

Alyssa is among the lucky au pairs. She has the entire guest house to herself so we were able to have private time there. Once we got settled, we started the hair cutting outside. I straightened out her bangs and Liezl finished them for a softer look. They turned out so well that I decided to cut my bangs as well. I'm not nearly as picky with my bangs since they're side-swept so they took just a minute. 

Gregoire had a good time playing with the girls. Alyssa was especially good with him. She's the cutest nanny ever and very attentive! I guess I'm just so used to having him that I get tired of playing all the time. It was refreshing to see him get along well with someone else though. They were so cute together :-)

I had dinner at Krystle's tonight with Andréa, Sebastien, and Dana so I grabbed some groceries on my way home. Gregoire had expended so much energy with Alyssa and Liezl that he was out the entire afternoon. I was able to cook, clean, and do laundry before he woke up. I made my favorite chili recipe though I had to change a few ingredients--they just don't exist in France. Dana and Krystle made tuna enchiladas which I've never had before. I'm more of a chicken or beef enchilada type of girl but they were still good no less. 

We've all decided to make dinner a weekly thing. That's so great because I did this every week with my friends back in the states. I really miss Mikey and his cooking and Dai, Rachel, Colin, Angela, Donald, and the rest of the group every Sunday night. I also miss Date Night with Lauren where we'd take turns cooking each other dinner and then going out to the bars on Thursdays. It'd be good to get a ritual going on with my new friends. We're planning on making pierogies together next week!!! I CAN'T WAIT!!!

One of Mikey's many culinary masterpieces. Photo courtesy of our friend Sing Howe

Lundi, 18 Février 2013: Facebook Friends

Do you guys ever go through your Facebook friends and try to find people you can delete? I feel like I do this every week and delete but maybe one person. It's annoying having 1600 friends on FB. How do I know all of them? I guess it's a hazard of being a social butterfly and living in different states and countries. Unlike the younger generation online, I've met all of my FB friends and know them personally. That's the thing. It's difficult to gauge when it's acceptable to delete someone. You certainly can't delete someone right after you've accepted their friend request--unless they've done something unforgivable. And for me, I keep all of the people I went to high school with and all of my sorority sisters. I went through a lot with those people and we have years of memories. It's difficult to stay in contact with everyone, but with FB, I still get to be a part of their lives and they can keep up with mine. 

Besides high school classmates and sorority sisters, there are the more random connections. There are those people you've hung out with but don't chat with much. You see each other often so the FB connection is merited. Then there are those people you really don't see much in person but keep in touch with regularly, that's also a connection you want to keep. Then I've got all of those people I met in college from classes or parties that I became good friends with in that period of my life. To me, those are friends, not acquaintances. It's like you don't talk for up to a year and you have one conversation and you feel like you never left each other. You know? 

It's impossible to go from A-Z and find people to delete so I've come up with a new plan. Birthdays! If you pop up on my events feed and I don't feel comfortable saying Happy Birthday to you or don't remember how I know you, I delete you. It's been going well for the past few weeks, ha haha. Does anyone else do this?

Dimanche, 17 Février 2013: The Way Sundays Should Be

This is the Sunday I've been wanting for ages...The only thing missing was brunch and mimosas. I finally got my movie day though. Technology is pretty great, especially since you can stream movies from the internet and catch up on all of your shows from the states. I'm not sure if Andréa was just unaware of this or if it doesn't exist in France but he seemed pretty surprised.

We started with Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters followed by Haunting in Connecticut: Ghosts of Georgia and finished with The Rebound. We watched all of them in English. I wasn't able to find any versions with french sub-titles and dub-overs annoy me. Andréa got the drift with Hansel and Gretel--the story wasn't too intricate and there was plenty of action. He had a bit of trouble with my horror flick though because it was all story and no action. It was really difficult for me to explain in French what was going on and I had a few brain farts along the way so I'm sure I didn't help. He absolutely loved The Rebound though. Catherine Zeta-Jones and Justin Bartha are amazing actors and love stories are generally easy to follow. 

If I'm able to manage it, I want to have a Movie Sunday every Sunday. I'll definitely have to bring back the mimosa tradition though...It's just not Sunday without it!!!

Eggs benedict and mimosas from my last proper Sunday :-( 

Samedi, 16 Février 2013: The Babysitter's Club

Does anyone remember The Babysitter's Club? I feel like that was a big part of my adolescence. The books, the TV show, my own babysitter's business. 

Andréa and I headed back to Aix Saturday evening to watch Gregoire while my host parents went out for their Valentine's Day celebration. Céline and Didier are so cute together!!! They obviously make a beautiful baby but they also make the perfect couple. They're a couple that play together, constantly joking with one another and laughing together. I'm certain they'll be together forever. 

I made dinner for the boys tonight. Steak with a red wine sauce and a cream-based cold pasta salad with salmon. These were two of my favorite dishes back in the states so I got a bit nostalgic throughout the cooking process. 

I recently bought a hula hoop that specializes in fat-breakdown. Sure, you can tone up with a regular hula hoop but this health hoop with massage balls is supposed to be more effective in a shorter period of time. With all of the bread, cheese, and pasta I've been eating and all of the grossness that is now on my belly, I've decided to take action. I hula hooped painfully for an hour while the boys played. I now have bruises all over my mid-section. It's disgusting and hurts so bad, but it seems to be working rapidly! Sleeping is a bit of a problem when you're black and blue...I didn't end up sleeping much...

Vendredi, 15 Février 2013: A Night of Bad Ideas

Krystle was having another get together tonight so I decided to bring all of my friends together. At the party there were my friends from class, my au pair friends, and my boyfriend. I kind of felt bad because it was mostly my people that showed up. But at least I asked. There was a new guy in our class that brought some people without permission. That's a no-no, no matter what culture you're from. This guy was also super creepy. He had this awkward habit of staring and not saying anything, but when he would speak, he would touch everyone's lower back--girls and guys included. My au pair friends left because of him. He and his friends subsequently left because there were no single girls left to flirt with. 

One of Sebastien's crazy french friends decided she really wanted to go out to a bar afterward. I was dead tired but Krystle told me that I couldn't leave her, so she, Sebastien, Andréa, and I were all driven downtown by this mystery party girl. 

We started at Manoir which was overly packed with more than your usual heap of creepers. I was so drunk, I just wanted to dance but I couldn't get more than a few wiggles out. Krystle and I were surrounded on all sides and weren't able to move so we decided to leave. On the way to the door some guy tried to hit on me--with Andréa just within earshot. I answered all of the guys stupid questions as politely as I could since I was stuck between people but when space opened up, I ran. BAD IDEA. I was moving way too fast in shoes with no tread and I was way too drunk to be weaving through people. I slipped once, caught myself, I slipped twice, caught myself, and when I hit the pavement outside I fell. The road outside was made up of smooth stone so there was no way I could avoid falling. One of my legs slipped out from under me and I landed in a somewhat graceful split. HA HAHA!!! The hoard of guys outside came to my rescue and I refused any help. The guys there are always looking for any sign of vulnerability--this is how they get laid. I assured everyone I was fine, popped right up, and saw Andréa running to my aid. I was so embarrassed but I was wasted so I didn't dwell on it too much.

We moved onto O'Neals next. The guys bought us all a huge liquor bucket which we all consumed. It's literally 3 liters of liquor and juice for 30 euro. ANOTHER BAD IDEA. I already went through my drinking phase when I was in high school so I know my limit all too well. I was 10x past that. Good thing I never black out. The girls and I went out to the dance floor and were having a decent time before every guy in there thought they'd try to get up on us. Thank goodness for Sebastien's friend because she protected me and told the guys to stay away. She was very adamant! The guys got the picture and we were able to dance undisturbed :-)

The bar finally closed down and I was so thankful because I couldn't take anymore dancing or drinking. I passed out on the way back to Marseille...

Jeudi, 14 Février 2013: PART III: My Valentine

Céline got home early tonight so I was able to leave for Marseille pretty early. But I didn't...It was pretty hectic at the house with all of the kids there so I didn't start getting ready until around 19h30. The girls helped me since I spent the last 10 minutes trying to untangle one of my favorite necklaces. That mission was fruitless and I left bare-necked in a black Marilyn Monroe style stress, black open-toed heels, and my favorite diamond studs. 

I arrived at Andréa's with my hands full. Keys in my teeth, overnight bag on my shoulder, Caramel Apple Cheesecake in one hand, while juggling a painting in the other hand--in heels no less. Andréa has had a thing for turtles stemming from childhood so I spent a good portion of my Tuesday afternoon painting him one. I don't  have any crazy artistic skills so I paint but maybe once every 5 years or so. I kind of messed up the turtle's visage so I just left it blank. I didn't want to screw it up anymore. I actually like it more that way. It gives the creature a bit of mystery. I've never given away one of my paintings before so Andréa's pretty special to me. 

I buzzed into Andréa's apartment and he greeted me at the door as he always does. I hadn't seen him for two days to build up the V-day surprise so it was kind of awkward at first. Once I kissed him though, it was all butterflies and daisies again. He was dressed in a classic white dress shirt and black slacks. I'm a sucker for the classic pieces. He also shaved his face for me--he knows I love it ;-) I pretty much melted when I saw him...He was so nervous too. That completely amplified how handsome he was to me.

I walked into the dining room to see a beautiful table he had prepared for our dinner. It was so cute!!! There were flowers and candles everywhere as well as some pretty swanky champagne and my favorite bottle of rosé. He used aluminum foil as placemats for everything. That was genius! It gave everything a crisp and modern appeal. I wonder why I hadn't come up with that idea myself...It was absolutely freakin' brilliant! I wonder if he came up with that himself...

Our dinner came in several courses. And yes, my handsome man planned and executed it all by himself. I'm so lucky to have a guy that can cook, and cook well!!! We started out with a bottle of Albert Rothschild champage, followed by a verrine as an appetizer, a salad, and an entrée. I had made dessert but we couldn't take anymore food by the end of the main courses...

From bottom to top: Smoked salmon, crème fraiche, guacamole, cocktail shrimp, and crostini sticks

Lamb lettuce, fried lardo, and breaded and fried goat cheese served with a red-wine vinaigrette

Duck breast sautéed in saké with crème fraiche for dipping, and a side of caramelized pear medallions

The caramel apple cheesecake that we haven't yet gotten to

Andréa of course got the huge painting along with a bracelet also hand-made by yours truly. My gifts didn't cost much but they certainly took time, effort, and some serious concentration. Andréa's gifts to me were more costly. He's paying for our trip to Spain so I can see Fallas in March. He got me some super hip glasses with the spanish coat of arms so I can represent :-) Andréa also gave me a beautiful bracelet that I'm absolutely in love with! I don't wear much jewelry but the jewelry I do wear is so simple. I like uncomplicated pieces with a clean look. I don't know how he knew. He even got the metal right. Maybe he really does just pay attention...

Andréa's really going to hate that I'm mentioning this but he wrote me a poem. Most of you know I'm really into romantic gestures so this was pretty much the icing on the cake. Andréa is learning English so he wrote it in English. He had a tough time rhyming so he gave me a French translation in case I didn't get the point. The translation was pretty spot on--rhyming and all. I almost died reading it! It completely touched me!!! This was the BEST Valentine's Day I've ever had!!! It was perfect!!! Is it possible to fall in love with the same person again every day? I think I do...

Jeudi, 14 Février 2013: PART II: A Brush With The Gendarmarie

I offered to drive Evelyn home after the au pair gathering. Her house was on the way and she had biked to centre ville. Not wanting to climb the horrendous hills on her way home, she agreed. We somehow managed to cram the huge bicycle into the Mégane's trunk with one of the back seats folded down. I took off with the trunk wedged open and the two girls crammed in the passenger seat. We made it safely to Evelyn's house, dropped her off, and headed off toward Liezl's the next town over. 

I took a shortcut I knew well and went through Meyreuil. The first light we came upon had just turned yellow as I was approaching it. I sped through the light because the distance was too short. It was unsafe for me to stop, especially with the car behind me. Liezl and I were cruising down the street at the speed limit for a good minute or so before 3 gendarmes surround my car and signal me to pull over. I immediately do so and one of the officers comes up to me to tell me that I ran a red light. I'm 100% sure that the light was yellow and tell him this. He takes my information and then asks me for 19 euro. I told him that I didn't have it because I thought it was a bribe. Meanwhile, poor Liezl is looking more and more nervous in the passenger seat but she tries to back me up. She tries telling him that she witnessed the light being yellow but the gendarme completely ignored her. The gendarmarie has a huge presence in France. They're military police and have quite the reputation. 

In the time that the gendarme took to copy down my information, the other two had stopped 6 other vehicles for other minor infractions. One guy that parked his truck in front of us was stopped because he didn't signal properly and a businessman behind us was apparently on his phone. Both of the men flipped out and the gendarmes didn't seem to react well so I decided to keep my mouth shut. I thought about going off on my guy too--but he was nice to me. He finished by asking me to sign a confession of my guilt. I thought twice about it and tried to refuse, but he eventually got my signature. 

After I dropped Liezl off, I went home and did some research on this semi-militaristic embodiment. Apparently, in France, the gendarme's word is the law. It doesn't matter whether you were actually guilty or not. If, in this official's mind, you broke the law, then simply put, you broke the law. Their accounts are considered truth here. They neither have to furnish evidence nor provide a witness to decide your fate. They say you're guilty, and it's done. It's also impossible to fight your way out of a ticket. One blogger recounted how a chief gendarme assured him no one has ever been 'let go' because they talked their way out of a ticket or because the officer felt sorry for them. Once you've been pulled over, the deal is done. Apparently, you can also get arrested if you curse. Swearing is an even bigger offense than traffic violations. Check out this blog post here. 

Another expat talks about her run-in with the gendarmes. She was ticketed for not stopping at a solid white line for a full 3 seconds. Read her post here. There are piles upon piles of expat blogs about the gendarmarie. If only the gendarmes spent more time watching how their own people drive. I mean, do they even see all of the dented cars on the streets? Actually, that's probably why they do these random busts. 

I've done so much Googling about driving laws in France and all of the violations you can get ticketed for. I'm already paranoid about speeding, but I'm definitely going to keep all of these rules in the back of my head from now on. Let's just say, I'll be driving very carefully no matter what the rest of the people are doing on the road. I don't want to waste my money on stupid stuff I can avoid. 

Here are some important notes about driving in France

Here's a list of French traffic violations, as well as the fines attached

Jeudi, 14 Février 2013: PART I: Au Pairs and Expats in Provence

Romy, the triplets' uncle had a new au pair arrive Tuesday. Her name is Liezl, she's 18 and from New Zealand. Romy was worried about introducing her to the wrong crowd like he did the last au pair so he asked if I'd introduce her to some good people. I recently met a few other au pairs from the area and thought they'd be a great start. 

I organized a little get-together in centre-ville through Chiara--an italian au pair in the area. The other girls I had met weren't able to come. I arrived at Romy's around 11h20 to pick up Liezl. The poor girl wasn't given the code to the gate so she couldn't exit, ha haha. The barriers were much to tight to squeeze through and much too high to jump. Luckily the neighbor was out in his garden. I had already met Christopher last fall so I wasn't shy about hollering for help. 

When Liezl and I got to the Cours Mirabeau the group we had originally expected had multiplied. Lucky for us because Liezl and I got to meet a bunch of great girls today! There was one expat, Ana, who is a 28 year old Romanian. The rest of us are au pairs. Chiara is a 23 year old Italian, Evelyn (18) is Canadian, and the Americans are Jessica (21), and Alyssa (24). The majority of the girls just arrived within the past few weeks but Ana and Chiara had lived in Lyon previously.

I was a bit hungry so I suggested we go underground and visite Crêpes-à-GoGo. The girls had never been there so they were keen on the idea. I accidentally mistook Liezl's crêpe for mine so she received it with a bite already taken out of it, ha haha. Poor girl. I know, I suck. The 7 of us took a walk around the market and got to know each other. I feel as if we all bonded instantly! 

While talking to the girls I found out that they were also couchsurfers! I absolutely love the world of couchsurfing!!! That site has been such a blessing to me and my travels. It's so amazing how you meet people that are so similar while you're doing the things you love.

Jessica had to leave for class halfway through. It turns out she's an IEFEE student like I used to be. And through CSA as well! And yes, she agrees that CSA is crap. [Reminder: If you are planning to study abroad, sign up with CEA!!! Rated #1] As Jessica left for class, the rest of us sat down at a café to finish our cute afternoon the French way. It was at this time that I decided indefinitely that I love this group of girls! We are so like-minded: Very independent with a strong work-ethic and yen for cultural enlightenment. I can't wait to hang out with them again, luckily, that's tomorrow! I've invited them to Krystle's party to meet that particular group of my friends. Krystle and Dana will love them!!!

Mercredi, 13 Février 2013: The Best Host Family Ever!!!

I am so blessed that my host family found me. The kids can be pretty wild at times but they're kids. What else would you expect??? They love and respect me as their sister. That's all that matters. My host parents though...They are BEYOND wonderful!!! Not only do they also love me as one of their own but they have made sure that my experience in France is a fulfilling one!!! They've taken me on trips and shown me signature events which I am so grateful for. The best thing about my host parents though is how they feed me! Sure, it's fine and dandy if you get to eat, but my Céline and Didier go the extra mile to make sure I experience true French cuisine and every bit of it. 

This week I experienced two new dishes. The first was grilled endive. It had a very interesting bitter flavor at first but once I allowed myself to fully experience all of the sensations, it was completely savory! The second dish was duck confit. I've had duck confit before--but it was always served in strips on salads back in the states. This was an entire leg of duck and  it was absolutely delicious!!! Apparently the duck confit I was given is world-renowned, coming from Gascony where it's a specialty. 

I say it all the time...I am a blessed girl!!! Here's to more food adventures!!! [Did I mention I ate goat spleen in Marrakesh? Watch out Andrew Zimmern!!!]

Grilled endive spinkled with gruyère, served with sautéed zucchini and broccoli

Duck confit baked in its own fat, served with green and white beans

Mardi, 12 Février 2013: Languages Lost

I've been reflecting a lot lately...About my past and the present...How I grew up...How I'm different now...

I was born and raised in Harrisonburg, Virginia--the south as dictated by the Mason-Dixon line. We're really in the mid-atlantic region but we were all brought up with southern values by our family, friends, neighbors, and teachers. When you're that close to a melting pot like Washington, D.C. your heritage is of great value. Everyone from home knows exactly where their bloodline originates and is proud of it! In keeping with tradition, my parents raised my brother, sister, and I with their cultures, MY culture. My dad is half Laotian and half Thai. My mom is a Vietnamese who was born in Laos. Mom also has a twinge of French blood from colonial history.

As a part of being aware of our culture our parents would speak to us in their respective languages. My dad would speak to me in Lao, my mom would speak to me in Vietnamese, and we would watch movies in Thai. I used to be so proficient with my languages! Knowing 4 languages fluently isn't really as difficult as it sounds, except when you lose practice!!! Once I got to a certain age I became embarrassed about my American accent. It just sounded awful when I spoke my parents' languages. I started replying to my parents in English and as their English skills improved, they began using a mixture of Lao/Viet/Thai/English (often in the same sentence).

While I was in middle and high school, I didn't connect with any of the Asian kids in our community, so I lost practice there when I stopped talking to them. Afterward, I went to university 10 hours away from home in a predominantly Caucasian area. The only time I was able to practice was when I took a job as a hostess at a Thai restaurant. Eventually I lost nearly all of my speaking skills and only retained oral comprehension of my parents' languages. This is what made me take French in the first place. I was missing something...A challenge of sorts. I took 4 years of French in high school and got a French minor in college. Now I'm living in France with a French family and enjoying life with a French boyfriend. 

Though my French skills are quickly rising, I still feel like something is missing. And after a lot of self-reflection, I'm sure it's the cultural pieces of me. I've decided to tap back into my heritage and re-learn all of the languages I grew up with. I started with Vietnamese because that's the language I'm least savvy with. I was going over all of the basics of the Vietnamese language today and as I began to recall everything, I became emotional. I had stopped talking to my Vietnamese grandmother on the phone because I couldn't think of how to reply in her language. When I think about it now, it's just so stupid of me. All I knew how to say was "Hi bà ngoại. Khỏe không?" --> 'Hi grandma. Are you well?' It was worse with my dad's mom,"mae thoux" even though I'm quite proficient in Lao. It was just my accent holding me back. 

I'm making it a point to go over my lessons for at least an hour for each language, everyday. Hopefully I'll be able to visit my bà ngoại and my mae thoux and have full conversations with them by the end of the year...Wish me luck! They're my last surviving grandparents...

Yep. That's my bà ngoại getting ready to down a beer on her birthday with my aunt, uncle, and cousin. I knew I came from a line of champs ;-) Though I'm not going to have 22 children like her, lol.

Lundi, 11 Février 2013: How To Advance In A Foreign Language

I've been thinking a lot about my language skills lately and how they've advanced. Sure, I still can't speak french fluently but I'm picking up more and more phrases everyday. Here are a list of things that I believe helped me...

1. Move to the country where the language you want to learn is spoken by the majority
2. Move in with a native family: 
1. Either with a host family through your school 
2. Au pair 
3. Or as a housekeeper
3. Take language classes at a local university
4. Find social events through Meetup or Couchsurfing
5. Change your mobile phone language. Yes, the display language AND the language you text in
6. Sign up for a dating site and practice your written skills with the endless number of creepers online
7. Date a native (if you're lucky enough to find someone compatible! Yes...I'm a very lucky girl)
8. Visit other countries where your new language is spoken
9. Just go out and talk to people!!! Visit all of the shops and markets available. Strike up a conversation with a stranger! Throw parties and invite natives--this is a must! 

I know how blessed I am but I didn't get here through sheer luck. It was through strength and perseverence! A lot of you have written me about your impending departure to a foreign land. I just want to say good luck to all of you, and I know you can do it! As always, message me if you have any specific questions. <3

Dimanche, 10 Février 2013: Oursinade [Sea Urchin Festival]

Andréa were in Carry-de-Rouet Sunday for Oursinade--the sea urchin festival. We took a walk around the boat dock where all of the vendors were situated. It was seafood galore!!! I've never seen so many urchins in my life! I'm allergic to shellfish but I absolutely love it!!! I used to have pretty bad reactions as a child but I fought through it and eventually my body learned to cope. To me, the food is worth the suffering. I still get itchy, swollen lips and throat every once in awhile, but that's only when the seafood hasn't been cleaned properly. 

Boat dock with vendors situated against the hill

Nom nom nom...Heaven

That's a ton of sea urchins!

My boyfriend buying way too many macaroons

Here's a close-up for all of you sweets fans ;-)

It was much too cold to dine out for the festival so we ate at Andrea's dad's house. There's really not much else to say except that it was AMAZING!!! Papa B is such a good cook and I always leave feeling satisfied. I'm sorry I don't have much to say but really, you'll get the idea with all of the pictures. Here are some snaps of what we ate...

Calamari, pan-fried with cognac and herbs

Marinated squid/octopus salad

Octopus tentacles that had been simmering in a tomato cognac sauce

Breaded and baked chicken and bananas--just for the hell of it

 My purple coffee cup and saucer, equipped with purple sugar, in a purple house :-)

A macaroon flight

Samedi, 9 Février 2013: The Fortune of Being Fortunate

Andréa and I were invited to his mom's house for lunch today. They had my new favorite cheese which I had mislabeled last time, it's Manchego. On top of that, Joelle had apparently made a surprise dish for me--something that I would like immensely. When we arrived I saw my surprise...Homemade lasagna!!! Ahhh!!! It was absolutely amazing!!! I normally like my lasagna drenched in tomato sauce but the way Joelle made it was perfect with the fresh tomatoes. I enjoyed it so much that I couldn't say no when she offered us some to take home for the night.

I met Andréa's sister for the first time today. She's 16 years older so she's normally off doing her own thing. She's the product of Joelle's first marriage--there's a lot of that in France nowadays. Candide is super nice and super beautiful in an age-appropriate sort of manner. She also speaks some english and that always makes me feel more comfortable when meeting strangers.

Albert, Andrea's step-father got the karaoke machine going after lunch. The microphones weren't working and he was intensely working on the issue like any normal engineer would. Even after we said we'd sing without the microphones he would just not let the problem go. He HAD to find the solution...I think we're kindred souls he and I because I'm exactly the same when it comes to technology. I picked up the owner's manual and took a gander inside. Albert never looks at the manual. Surprisingly there were instructions in english and I asked all of the appropriate questions before I found a probable solution. I had gotten up to show Albert the connection diagram when he kind of pushed me aside and said "No, no, ça va" and everyone sitting at the table said that he had just thought of the solution. It kind of offended me at first because I wanted to contribute but I understood because like I said before, I'm just like him and I never want any help.

Albert finally got the microphones working about 20 minutes later after we had already started singing. Joelle and Candide sing wonderfully and I felt a bit intimidated even though I have had over 15 years of formal training. I kind of stopped enjoying singing after dating a guy who was a music snob. I've only just begun to enjoy it again but it's difficult to fully take pleasure in music with my host family. The kids are always singing over me off-key, making up words because they don't try to learn the lyrics, and changing the station to something more overplayed. It was nearly impossible before but I've made it a new rule in my car that no one is allowed to touch the dial without my permission. They've listened, so far.

The family and I sang karaoke for about 3 hours, maybe more. I got somewhat bored half-way through because I didn't know any of the french songs. I tried to at least act like I was entertained because everyone else was having a super time. 

We eventually parted ways though and Andréa and I headed back to his apartment just a few minutes away. At one of the stoplights, there was a man stopping at everyone's windows and begging. I hadn't given out any money to panhandler's since my first month in France so I thought it was a good time to start again. If any of you read that post, you know that I basically gave all the cash I came to France with because I didn't have to use the money on anything else. I looked through my wallet to find some coin pieces for the man. I didn't find any 1 or 2 euro coins but I found what looked like a 5 euro bill to me. I pulled it out and handed it to the man quickly because the light had turned green. The man's eyes lit up, he said "merci beaucoup!" and we took off. I turned to Andréa who had his mouth wide-open..."VINGT EUROS?!?!?!?" I didn't answer and thought to myself and came to the conclusion that he was probably right, it WAS 20 euros! The 5 euro bill and the 20 euro bill are basically the same color but I was sure Andréa was right. I knew what change I had gotten from the bar Thursday night --the last time I had used my cash, and a 5 was not a part of that. Oh well...There's my cap for the month. Besides, Andréa had said he had never seen that man begging before and those are roads that he frequents often. The man was standing in freezing weather and going window to window so he probably actually needed the help. That's what I hope for anyway. 

On the other side of the "impoverished," there are the gypsies that stand at every stop light. I try to avoid stopping at these lights if possible because I know that I will not be able to say no. After today though, I don't think I will ever give money to a Romani ever again. Andréa says that he always sees the same women at the same street lights with different children. It could be that these women have several children of the same age group, but unlikely. According to Andréa, they carry the children around to make you feel sorry for them. He made me observe today while we were driving around and the child was fighting to get away from one of the women. This reaction made it less plausible that the child belonged to her.

I'm always up for donating to the less fortunate. It's how I was raised--both by my southeast asian parents and by my teachers and mentors in "the south." I've grown a bit weary though, especially after seeing a TV documentary on panhandlers while I was in school at Ball State. One particular beggar was interviewed on the streets of Indiana and he claimed he made $50K a year just asking for money on the streets. At the end of his interview he hopped into a car much nicer than mine. I'm not sure how reputable the source is but it sure has put a sour taste in my mouth...

Vendredi, 8 Février 2013: Melinda the Chauffeur

I was supposed to meet up with two new au pairs today who had just moved to the south of France. I had to cancel though because I ended up having to drive one of the triplets around all day. Léa had a dentist and orthodontist appointment today which her father was supposed to take her to but he ended up canceling because apparently he had other plans. 

My day was quite leisurely until 10h30. I picked Léa up from her dad's house and then carted her down to centre ville to meet with her mom. I didn't really have anything to do in the city center so I headed back to the house in Meyreuil. 30 minutes later maman texts me to say that they're almost finished. Instead of taking the normal way back, I got on the highway and was there in about 5 minutes. I picked Léa up and we headed back toward Meyreuil. I decided to stop at Paul's, a sandwich shop, so Léa and I could get lunch without disturbing Didier and his colleague back at the house. 

Léa and I headed back to the house after lunch and I finished painting some closet doors and folded a few loads of laundry until we had to leave again. This time we met maman at the orthodontist. Maman had said that the appointment wouldn't take long but I didn't believe her so I took off for a drive. I parked in a parking spot for a few minutes so I could text Andréa. During this time, the other two triplets, their half-brother, and their dad's new nanny randomly strolled by. This girl did not seem nice at all. She didn't say anything when I said 'hi' to her. She just kept on walking. Whatever. It doesn't make any difference to me really, but your manners with strangers ultimately translates to how you behave around your host family. She looks like she's doing her job though--that's all that really matters. 

I had barely finished talking to Camille and Baptiste before maman texted me just 5 minutes after I dropped Léa off and said that they would be done soon. I turned the car around. I arrived back at the orthodontist's office just a few minutes later and pulled into an illegal parking spot assuming maman and Léa would be down soon. About 40 minutes later the two of them come down and I had finished half of the first volume of Vampire Diaries--in french. The next time mom tells me she's ready to go, I'm just going to wait until she calls me...

I hadn't planned on seeing Andréa tonight but I was so exhausted from the day that I decided to head to Marseille. I felt bad leaving the family especially since this is one of the two weekends where I get to see Antoine and Nicolas but I was so ready for a break. I was supposed to be gone Saturday and Sunday for some festivities anyway so I decided to just make the weekend last a little bit longer...

Jeudi, 7 Février 2013: And The Creepers Keep On Coming...

Thursday is my usual night with the girls if I somehow find the energy. Tonight, I went out with Sandra, Caroline, and Vanessa. We started out at The Kerry which is a pretty laid-back bar. I got a draft beer with cherry syrup while the girls stuck with classics like Guinness and Framboise. The four of us were barely settled at a corner table before some drunk idiot came up to us and thought he'd have a chance. That's not meant to sound snobby in any way but we obviously wanted to be left alone--our body language said it all. This didn't stop the guy though. He was slurring his words, taking sips out of our drinks, and continuously touching us. He rested his hands on my knees twice and both times, I just grabbed his hands, lifted them up, and dropped them in mid-air. He was so drunk that he nearly toppled over as he was saying 'sorry.' His non-creepy friend came along and we enjoyed his company for a bit before everyone decided we'd had enough of the other guy and left. 

The girls and I headed to Bataclan next--kind of a grandiose bar. It was here that we met two middle-aged Libyans--an older man and woman who kind of run the bar scene together. The woman had originally come up to us to ask us where we were from because I guess we don't behave as normal bar patrons behave here. She told us we were beautiful but it was she that was absolutely gorgeous!!! She's half libyan and half vietnamese. Agh, I can wait but I also CAN'T wait to have halfsie babies!!!

It was around 1h00 so the dancing was about to get started in all of the clubs. We left Bataclan and headed to Murano to get our groove on. It was a complete sausage-fest in there!!! The four of us basically made up the majority of the girls. It was impossible to dance without some guy touching us and trying to pull us in. I had really gotten sick of it after about the third time. I just wanted to dance undisturbed--why can't that ever happen here?!? Lucky for me, Caroline was feeling sick so this was my perfect excuse to go home. I really hate how guys behave at the clubs and bars out here but how else am I gonna get my nightclub fix???